Just WOW! It's time to talk.

Hey whats up? I hope everyone who is reading this, is having a good day. If your not, cheer up because life is good even when you can't always see it.  I know this quite a departure from the usual postings of this blog but sometimes I gotta throw caution to the wind. Let my reader know a little bit about me. Today I received an amazing message from a mother who had seen my blog through PBteen's Facebook. We shall call her J.J. Her son has been the brunt of some bullying. However he has grown and dealt with being bullied with some real class. He's made some knew friends and knows they are his friends and doesn't let his bully get him down. I can often be a little insecure about my own work and it was really nice to receive a little insurance that I was doing a good job.

J.J's  cousin's son God Rest his soul took his own life due to bullying, No one knew it was that bad. That is something you hear far to often from those left in the wake. When your being bullied, you learn to wear masks. I always had the biggest forced smile on my face but not to many knew just how much I was hurting. Because everything seemed alright.

I got to a point where, I didn't want to exist. I wanted it all to stop the voices of self-doubt, the constant loop of taunts and jeers from my so called peers that bounced around my head late at night. I wanted the dark and the hurt to just stop. I got so far down that road I set a date for my own self-execution when I was eighteen. I realized I'd gotten to the point where I was no longer thinking about taking my life, I was going to do it.

At that point, I realized I had to grow a pair of balls and talk to somebody that had been around the block a few times not another kid to confide in. I had set all my pride and fears of being rejected for being seen as a wimp off to the side and just talk. I ended up talking to the new principal of high school. He actually was in the admissions department as an accountant and the first person I ever met at the school. I probably never told him every thing in high definition detail but I talked with him a lot and that really helped ground me and gave me something to reach out and grab on to when things got to dark.

Communication is one of the most basic and important life skills a person could have. Learning to really communicate and have deep conversation really helps you out in life. You discover things about yourself and stuff about those your talking to. You'll often discover the advice you were not really asking for or looking for but know it'll come in handy. Don't get stuck in the dark find a mentor to talk to. It  doesn't always have to be mom or dad, it could be a sports coach, teacher, a church pastor or elder but it has to be someone you know you can trust and that your safe with. I've even had a few meaningful talks with local police officers and FireFighters at the local station.

Anyways it's long past a Hutch's bedtime so I'm going now G'night folks.
Feel free to leave a comment.

Sometimes it's You

I know, I know bullying is something bullies do but sometimes it's you. Sometimes you have to sit back and take a good look at yourself. Because you may just be guilty of doing things that really cause people to bully you.

Maybe you are a little arrogant without realizing it. You outwardly show people you believe you are far more important than they are. It's crazy but this is very possible despite being bullied and having low self-confidence.

Maybe you brag a lot about your new toys that are better than other peoples. Some of these things leave people feeling devalued and like they are worth less and they last out against you. Simply because kids are cruel and can't quite make the links which adults can. In the adult world those actions result in co-working being civil to you when required but often see to it they don't invite you to functions that are not on the company dime.

On the flip side, you may not be getting bullied but maybe your just getting excluded from things because your shy or quiet and often have never asked to be included. When I was in early grade school this was the case for me. I was excluded from most things because I was quiet and never asked to play with the other children. They just thought I preferred to play a lone.

So take a good look at yourself maybe you are doing something that has contributed to your own bullying without you really knowing about it.

Getting Made Fun Of.......Then Do It RIGHT BACK!

I'm a realist. growing up, you are going to be made fun of at some point in your life. You'll later go on to be made fun of sometimes as an adult. Thankfully adults have a little something called tact, usually. Since you'll most likely be made fun of by somebody you don't like and it might sting at times, you might as well learn how to deal. Being made fun of is supposed to be harmless by nature. Think about it, you've probably made fun of your little dorky brother and he's made fun of you.  I noticed this when I was around fifteen. When it came to being made fun of, it wasn't so much being made fun of that got to me. It was when people who bullied me did it.

Bullies always seek some kind of reaction. Normally an expected reaction, Bullies expect you to cry or be upset; They do not expect the unexpected. I decided, to play this in my favor, give them a reaction they were not expecting. I learned to make fun of myself.  When they made fun of me, I did it right back.....I Made Fun Of Myself.

Making fun of yourself does a few things with bullies they get bored because they are not causing the reactions they want and bugger off or they start to laugh which is all fine and dandy because it's healthy, you've contributed to their longevity.

However this also effects you, you begin to find out the very things about yourself that your making fun of are things you actually kind of like.  You find yourself not caring what people think about them because you like them. When your able to make fun of yourself and have fun doing it. When other people do it you just see is as pointless fun and when there really bad at it, you find them tasteless.

So next time you get made fun of, trying making fun of yourself right back.
- H

Why

Name: Hutch
Stereotype: NO
Victim: YES
Status: Survivor





This is a project I have been fighting with myself over for quite sometime. Should I Do It? Why Should I Do It? No I Shouldn't Do it? the list goes on. Since you are reading this, my choice to do this has been made obvious.  I'm doing this because I can. I'm doing this because I don't like aspects of whats out there and I'm doing this, Because I've been there and I've survived.

I Hutch was bullied not just by my classmates but those in authority. I said I did not agree with a lot of the current projects geared toward bullying and it's truth. Right now if you honestly paid attention to the ones you here about are largely LGBT centric. It's as if only people within the LGBT community will suffer bullying of some sort in school. The truth is everyone can be bullied but not everyone does get bullied.  I have a problem with " It Gets Better" not so much the organization but it's name, it's very wait and see and not very PRO-ACTIVE and I'm not referring to the pimple cream you've got stashed away in your underwear drawer.

There are a lot of movements to END bullying, I've pitched my own bits toward some of these small uprisings on youtube. However you never here anything about how to deal with being bullied and how to deal with bullies when your the one being bullied. So I'll be that one who talks about how to deal with being bullied, how to handle it. Because I've been there. Consider this if you will " Hutch's DeClassified Bullies Survival Guide". I'm no psychologist but if you give me a chance and take me on, I'll give you my TIPS the things that really worked for me and helped me get to where I am.